What Make Up Means To M.E. - Why I Wear It & Why I Started My Blog

There are two main reasons why I like makeup, firstly I love that it can transform you into something different. I like the fact that you can create a completely different look without a change of clothes. Secondly I love getting ready to go out and for me doing my makeup for a night out is as much fun as actually going out! However I'm quite laid back and I don't wear makeup everyday. I will wear it for work to look presentable and when I meet friends at the weekend or for a night out to look my best. I don't really care if a boyfriend or any of my friends sees me without any make up on.

When I started getting interested in makeup 

When I started secondary school I was allowed to wear nail polish and I typically a wore glitter or a different shade of purple or blue on each finger. At about 13 years old I began wearing Rimmel white or silver eye shadow to make my eyes stand out behind my glasses. I also wore Collection 2000 (as it was known back then) black mascara and clear or pink lip gloss. After watching renowned make up artist Kevyn Aucoin on the Ricki Lake show I went out and bought his book Making Faces, where he used make up to transform celebrities into looking like other celebrities. Some of them were incredible. I also used to tear out the pages from Bliss and Sugar! magazines for make up inspiration. 

I discovered eyeliner when I went to university. I used Bourjois liquid eyeliner in black and while it's not the easiest eyeliner to start off with I found it much easier to use than pencil liner. I didn't start wearing foundation until I was 20 years old. The reason I hadn't worn foundation before was that the high street in the '90's only offered pink toned foundations and I have a yellow toned tan complexion. (They still lean this way despite the multi cultural makeup of the UK.) My first foundation was from Clinique because they had more inclusive shades and I had a bit more money to spend than I did in my teenage years. I later found the shades ran too terracotta instead of yellow and I'm still trying to find my Holy Grail foundation (Shu Uemura and Estee Lauder have been the best matches so far.) After foundation my first high end product I bought for myself were Lancome's Juicy Tubes as they were really popular at the time.  After I left university I wore makeup to look presentable for work.

Feeling Ill

In my late 20's I knew there was something physically wrong with me health-wise but I didn't know what it was. I caught the flu but while the rest of the symptoms disappeared I still had this unrelenting, extreme tiredness every day. I would get jelly legs and collapse while washing up the dishes on a Friday or Sunday night. If I got less than 11 hours sleep I would be unable to walk from the top of the bed to the bottom of the bed without collapsing. Some days I could barely talk. It was making me depressed because I had barely any energy to carry on with my usual routines and duties in my life. So I began to start wearing thicker foundation and used make up as a mask to cover how unhappy I was and to make sure that people wouldn't notice I was unhappy or ill. It sounds a bit illogical but I was a teacher and your job involves putting up a front or a performance in the classroom and the make up was part of my costume.

Anyway my life ground to a halt when I came home on the last day of school in May. The physical exhaustion made me bed bound for two weeks and then housebound for around 18 months. This time in my life was about survival. I couldn't even hold a graphite pencil or a metal dinner fork because it was too heavy for me as my muscles had wasted away. I could only walk a few metres. After my big collapse I was finally diagnosed with M.E. or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (now renamed as Systemic Exertion Intolerance Disease ) but that didn't really help very much as the only advice the specialist had was that I was young at 27 and would recover but gave me no information on how to get better or any treatment or leaflets and discharged me! (I managed to get some treatment later and it helped a little bit but didn't 'cure' me or eliminate the dysfunctional tiredness. NHS treatment is limited: there's Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, graded exercise and some doctors will administer Vitamin B12 injections.) There is no long term cure at this point in time and research is underfunded.

M.E. often starts with someone having the flu, stomach flu, glandular fever (mono.) or shingles. Then some of the symptoms go way but you don't recover or bounce back to normal and the debilitating  tiredness remains leaving you only able to function at a much lower level. This can be 50% or less than normal. Think about your own life, operating at 50% means you will have to turn down nights at the pubs, cinema trips, visiting family, going to church, holidays, cleaning the house, not showering  as much as you like in order to keep your job or your family together. To survive from one day to the next you may just have to do the minimum or what you are able to do so you don't collapse and becoming bed bound or suffer pain from too much stimulation (light, noise, smells.) M.E. can result in years of being housebound or bedbound rather than just 'lockdowns' which have an end date. 

The current pandemic has seen the rise of  'Long Covid' or Long haulers, where people don't fully recover from the Covid 19 virus. They share some of the same symptoms of M.E. notably the extreme physical and mental fatigue, memory problems and 'brain fog' where it is difficult to understand or engage in a conversation, read or follow a TV show. The UK government has donated £18.5 million to fund 4 studies of long COVID in the hope to understand and develop treatment that may have implications for M.E. treatments as well.  

Anyway a year later when I was physically able to do a few more things, I made a New Year's resolution to start wearing make up again. I wasn't working and didn't have a boyfriend, the make up was for me. I felt well enough to start concentrating on grooming again. It was also to recapture some of the old me. I went out and bought some lightweight make up brushes. Then I started playing around with makeup, copying looks from magazines, working it out as there weren't any guides or listed products beside the pictures. Around 2009-2010, UK makeup artist Lauren Luke became a big sensation on Youtube and and I began watching her videos.

I was still housebound and so any visitors to the house was a big event and excuse to wear makeup! When I saw people they would say that 'you don't look ill'  because I was wearing makeup. I still wore it because I felt so drained and shit all the time I didn't want to have to look shit as well. Anyway I really got into watching Youtube make up tutorials. I loved Tiffany D she is a true artist and amazingly talented but unfortunately doesn't do tutorials or much makeup content these days. I learnt the most from Sineady Cady (The Makeup Chair) as her tutorials were really easy to follow. I also watched Wayne Goss who seemed honest and succinct. I liked a lot of his makeup hacks and techniques especially his contouring video here.

Why I started this blog.

One of my symptoms of having M.E. / Chronic Fatigue Syndrome was forgetting how to spell. It was like that type information had gone missing from my memory. Somehow I found the beauty review site MakeupAlley. I started writing reviews on make up products I had used and I found my spelling was improving. Then I thought why not have all my reviews together in a blog? I loved writing and also hoped to help people through giving honest reviews and find other people who were also into makeup as much as I was. I didn't have any sisters to talk to and my mum wasn't into make up. She thought my interest in make up was frivolous but for me it was an escape. While blogging I've also picked up other skills such as styling photographs, using social media and a bit of HTML.

Why I wear Make up 

Makeup is something I wear for me, to look presentable and feel special and I would put it on to meet up with friends. However since the pandemic I haven't been wearing much makeup but writing this reminds me of how much I love it and going to make an effort to keep up my morale (and I have a lot of mascaras in my stash to test!) I must stress that my reasons for wearing makeup have been my own personal experience, others with M.E /CFS have their own reasons for wearing make up.

While I haven't recovered from M.E. I credit The Lightening Process for improving my quality of life. The best way of explaining it is NLP and self hypnosis. You use previous memories of a healthy you to remind your body how it used to function when it was well. You reunite the body and mind.  It helped me to break the boom bust cycle where you do a lot on your good days as you finally have some energy and then payback happens where you end being bed bound for the rest of the week. The lightening process gave me energy to be spontaneous, I'm no longer housebound, I can walk further and generally seem to be improving. 

Although this diagram is for Dysautonomia it applies to most chronic illnesses

The advice I would give to anyone suffering from fatigue is to write down your daily activities and categorise them as low or high energy. So changing my bed, walking to the post box, having a shower, or phoning the bank require a lot of energy. Reading a book or writing a blog post are low energy tasks for me. It will be different for lots of people. Plan a daily schedule where you make sure high energy tasks are spread out with lower energy tasks in-between.  There's also pacing which you kind of learn anyway which means you 'rest' (don't sleep or watch TV or read because they are activities not a proper rest) or mediate and cut back on activities you have to do. If you used to do a three hour clean and tidy blitz, you now need to divide the tasks into bite sizes and breaks across the day (s). Otherwise you may push yourself too far and be unable to do anything for days after.  Maybe you used to jam pack your schedule or were always late because you underestimated how much time you had. Now you need to overestimate how long activities take and add buffer zones of rest in-between. These rest breaks can be 15 minutes, a few hours or day in-between. You may need to delegate household chores or work part time or have to stay home and rest. I only do one thing a day so if I have to go to a hospital appointment that will be the only thing I do that day. I will rest and sleep afterwards. And the following day will be resting indoors as well

If someone tells you that they can't meet up tomorrow because they had a bath yesterday- BELIEVE THEM as preposterous as it seems because if you have M.E. you only have so much energy to live on for the week because sleep and food don't seem to top up your energy enough to function fully. The spoons theory explains living with chronic illness well. This pandemic has meant that many people have experienced the loneliness of isolation that many with chronic illness live with. So please post covid, remember to include and check up on your friend or family member who happens to have a chronic illness.  If anyone has lost someone directly or indirectly to covid my heart goes out to you. 

If anyone wants to know more about having Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/M.E. tweet me or send me an Instagram DM. For more information or to make a donation contact ME Association  or Action for ME  (U.K) 

8 Beauty Shows You Need To Watch!

Reality TV Competitions

Glow Up Britain's Next Make Up Star (BBC3 Tuesdays/ iplayer /  Netflix)

Glow up is a British reality show where ten aspiring make up artists compete for a contract assisting the worlds biggest make up artists. For 8 weeks they have to live and compete against each other.  The show is back for a third series, now hosted by Maya Jama with judges Dominic Skinner (global senior artist for MAC Cosmetics) and Val Garland (make up director of L'Oreal Paris and a contributing beauty editor at British Vogue magazine.)  After seeing Val Garlands name beside so many catwalk looks it was nice to put a face to the name. I can see why they chose her because she is very theatrical. The show's assignments involve creating looks for fashion magazines, catwalk shows and backstage theatre make up. Special guests have included Michelle Visage. Season 1 is available on Netflix and Seasons 1-3 are available on  the BBC iplayer. 

Face Off (Amazon Prime. /Amazon prime with Hayu.)

This show follows special effects makeup artists as they compete to win  US$100,000 and a year's supply of makeup from Alcone. It is hosted by actress McKenzie Westmore and judged by film and TV make up artists Glenn Hetrick, Ve Neill and Michael Westmore. It feels like the same set up as Project Runway but Face Off was produced and aired by the Sy fi channel. I loved watching  the contestants working with materials like clay, prosthetics, silicone, latex and moulds. While the first two series were focussed on drama the later seasons concentrated on the artistry side of the competition. 

Season 1 is on Amazon Prime. Seasons 8, 9 & 10 Amazon prime with Hayu. 

Documentaries

Make Up A Glamorous History (BBC 2  Tuesdays 9pm/ iplayer. Youtube Documentaries channel here)

This show takes a historical look at what people applied to their faces in the name of beauty. It is a three part series hosted by renown makeup artist  Lisa Eldridge , who has a fascination for how makeup was used throughout  history and has written the book “ Face Paint” on the subject.  Only this time instead of reading about it you can see what all these handmade cosmetics looked like on the skin. The first show explores the Georgian period, next week will focus on the Victorian period and the last show will focus on the early 20th century (probably the 1920's.) Is it very reminiscent of Lucy Worsely's series on the Georgians and Victorians, although this series has a slightly different perspective because Lisa employs her make up artist background to make and compare authentic formulas. She  uses cochineal (crushed beetles, still used today) applied with Spanish wool to give a natural blush that resembles Benefit Cosmetics Benetint.  The show also looks at the hairstyles of the period as well. At the end she puts all the traditional make up techniques to make up a model and style her hair. It's great if you have a curiosity about makeup, or love learning about history. It's very useful if you are interested in becoming a makeup artist or costume designer. 

Broken (Netflix Episode 1 Makeup Mayhem)
This show looks at the current beauty industry, comparing heavyweight giant L'oreal to indie Youtube Guru Marlene Stell of  Make Up Geek and fast fashion /make up Colorpop. Colorpop explain that they can produce so many items because they manufacture in house in America, which keeps costs down. They then focus on counterfeit beauty and why it is so dangerous. I was really shocked when a girl described buying a fake Kylie Lip Kit that had superglue in it and ended up sealing her lips together! The reporters interview custom officers and the police about counterfeit beauty products. We are shown the infamous Santee Alley which is jam packed with market stalls selling large batches of high end counterfeit make up. The police do try to shut them down but it's an ongoing operation like the game 'Whack a Mole', new ones always pop up. This was the first documentary I watched on the topic and I found it really educational and fascinating.

Beauty Laid Bare (BBC 3 iplayer/ Some clips available on Youtube)
This documentary follows four twenty-somethings with different attitudes towards makeup. They head to America to reveal the ugly truth behind the glamorous, multi-billion dollar beauty industry. First there's Chloe a makeup artist and influencer from Belfast; Casey, who uses makeup to express his identity as a gay man and Resh from Manchester who uses make up to help her self esteem and use as a coping mechanism after an acid attack. Finally there's Queenie, from London who doesn't really care about the beauty industry and is cynical about all marketing claims.

The three episodes cover Beauty Con,  Colorpop and Benefit Cosmetics factory tour, counterfeit products, plastic packaging recycling and the effects on sewage system. They also look at common ingredients such as parabens and talc mines contaminated with asbestos. The most poignant moment was watching the production of candelia wax which uses sulphuric acid in the process. It hits too close to home for Resh when she realises that the ingredient in the creams she uses to treat and camouflage her burns uses the very same acid she was attacked with to produce candelia wax. The workers are not given any protective equipment even though the work is so dangerous. It is a very interesting and eye opening documentary that thoroughly examines the beauty industry-  but beware you may never look at cosmetics in the same way again.

Unmasked Make-Up's Big Secret (BBC 3 iplayer/ The Truth About My Make Up Youtube  )
What makes our lipstick glossy and foundation smooth? Palm oil. It's used in 70% of beauty products but what is this ingredient doing to our planet? This documentary follows Emmy Burbidge, a beauty salon owner and makeup artist taking a trip to Papa New Guinea to investigate the production of palm oil and their consequences such as deforestation, sustainability and unfair trade practices. Supermarket chain Iceland created an animated Christmas TV advert in 2018 that promoted their own labelled products as being free of palm oil. This advert was controversy banned on TV for criticising the use of palm oil, you can see the advert on Youtube here. 

Bargain Beauty A Toxic Gamble ( Facebook) 
This documentary is presented by Natalia Jorquera and it investigates counterfeit beauty products in the UK and uncovers why people buy them, citing the pressure social media has. After sending some counterfeit make up to the lab they reveal high levels of toxic ingredients such as lead, paint stripper and faeces (yes you read that right, poo). They interview dermatologist Dr Anjali Mahto, who describes the symptoms that using fake make up can cause including skin rashes, allergies and even chemical burns Additionally some of the metals that have been found in fake products have the potential to cause long term problems with the nervous system and brain. They also interviewed vlogger Maya Gibson who did a video using counterfeit products, when she turned the camera off just 5 minutes later she got an acne flare, spots and part chemical burn on her lips. They also showed examples of genuine and fake products and asked beauty therapy students to tell them apart and found that many of them gave the wrong answer.

Based on a true story / Historial Drama

Self Made (Netflix)

This show is inspired by Madam C J Walker who in 1910 became America's first female self made millionaire after founding a company making hair care products and cosmetics for black women. It stars Octavia Spencer as Sarah Breedlove (a character based on Walker) and friend turned rival Addie, played by Carmen Ejogo.  

TV Shows & Films To Watch This Halloween

Celebrate Halloween by watching a scary movie or by binge watching a supernatural T.V. show. Here  are my picks for the best scary films and T.V. shows. Grab your popcorn and let's get started. 

The Classics 

Scream (1996) (Amazon Prime/itunes /Dvd)

A year after the murder of her mother, a teenage girl is terrorised by a new killer who uses horror film quizzes as part of a deadly game. This is a satirical slasher film, something that was quite groundbreaking and unusual at the time. 

Psycho (1960) (Amazon Prime/itunes/Dvd)

A secretary called Marion embezzles $40,000 from her employer's client and goes on the run. When she stops for the night at the ramshackle Bates Motel she meets the polite but highly strung owner Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins) He is controlled by his mother and doesn't have a life of his own. However something bad befalls Marion during her motel stay. 

Crooked House (Netflix/Amazon Prime)

Crooked House is based on Agatha Christie's novel. The story begins with the death of business tycoon Aristide Leonides. His granddaughter Sophia asks Charles Hayward, a private investigator to look into the matter because she believes he was murdered by a family member. Sophia describes Aristide's regular insulin injection had been laced with eserine from his eye drops which caused a fatal heart attack. She believes this was deliberate, not accidental. 

TV shows

The Haunting of Hill House (Netflix) 

When a family move into a big, old mansion in order to flip it over the summer they did not expect the house to be filled with malevolent forces. The Haunting of Hill House slowly draws you into the story and shows the lasting trauma on each member of the family and the family dynamics. The children are really good actors and I liked the fact that while most horror plots focus on the scary thing in the here and now, this show illustrates the lasting consequences of the trauma which gives the plot more depth. I've finished watching this so I'll be watching The Haunting of Bly Manor next which features a lot of the same cast although the characters and plot are different. 

Stranger Things (Netflix)

Stranger Things is mixture of sci-fi and horor. Set in the 80's the show begins with the disappearance of a boy called Will Byers. At the same time a girl called Eleven escapes from a laboratory and she teams up with Will's friends to use her psychokinetic powers to find Will. The search party that follows has to fight terrifying, supernatural forces to get Will back.

The Sinner (Netflix)

For some reason I've only watched the third season but it's a good show.  Bill Pullman is  a police detective who investigates crimes committed by unlikely culprits and attempts to uncover the culprits' motivations. 

The Vampire Diaries (Netflix/Amazon Prime)

Elena (Nina Dobrev) and her brother Jeremy are living with their aunt because their parents were recently killed in a car crash. On the first day of high school she is intrigued by a new boy, Stefan. Stefan is actually a vampire and he is drawn to Elena because she looks like the love of his life Katherine, a vampire from his past. Stephan's brother Damon returns trying to create chaos because he hates that Stephan turned him into a vampire against his will. They eventually make up and Elena begins dating Stephan but then she becomes attracted to Damon. She is torn between the two brothers. When Mystic Falls attracts various supernatural beings including Katherine the brothers try to protect Elena. I love the love triangle and find the romance and story more compelling that Twilight (please don't hate me!) I also love the music score as well.

The Originals (Netflix/Amazon Prime)

A spin-off from The Vampire Diaries, this show focuses on the Mikaelson family who are the earliest and the original vampires. The power hungry Mikaelsons move to New Orleans and form an alliance with local witches in order to rule the city once again. 

Locke and Key (Netflix) 

After Rendell Locke is murdered, his wife Nina decides to move her children Tyler, Kinsey, and Bode to his ancestral estate Keyhouse. The children soon discover a number of mysterious keys throughout the house that can be used to unlock various doors in magical ways.  However they soon become aware of a demonic force that is also searching for the keys for its own evil purposes.

The Chilling Tales of Sabrina the Teenage Witch (Netflix)

This reincarnation of Sabrina the Teenage Witch is a lot darker than the original 90's sitcom featuring Melissa Joan Hart. This show opens with Sabrina turning 16, the time for her 'dark baptism.' The dark baptism means pledging her loyalty to the Dark Lord Satan. Sabrina is conflicted as she has to choose between her family and their dark legacy and the 'normality' of Baxter high school and her friends. In season one she tries to balance her two worlds, being half-witch and half-mortal all while fighting the evil forces that threaten her family and friends. In season two she embraces her 'witch' side by deciding to attend the Academy for Unseen Arts full time. However a prophecy about Sabrina shakes the foundation of the Church and her relationship to the dark lord.

Dexter  (Amazon Prime/ itunes/ Sky Atlantic)

Dexter was left orphaned at age 3, when his mother was brutally murdered with a chainsaw by drug dealers. He was adopted by police officer Harry Morgan. When Harry discovers Dexter's sociopathic tendancies he tries to control them by only letting him kill the criminals who slip through the justice system. Dexter has a double life as he also works at the Miami Police department as a blood splatter analyst. This job gives him a cover story but he finds it hard juggling his double life. If you like gory, thriller stories this is the show for you.

Buffy The Vampire Slayer (Channel  4 On Demand / Amazon Prime)

One of the best things to come out of the '90's (beside Friends) is Buffy. Buffy (Sarah Michelle Geller) is a high school student destined to slay vampires, demons and other supernatural creatures. Librarian Giles is her 'watcher' who gives Buffy advice and direction. With his help and the help of her friends Willow and Xander she protects Sunnydale. The Sunnydale high school also happens to be on the hellmouth, the crux of evil. If you fancy a laugh check out the original Buffy The Vampire film (1992) starring Donald Sutherland and Kristy Swanson. 

Kids & Family films

The Witches (1990/2020 ( itunes/DVD)

I know that this film has been remade with Anne Hathaway which you can watch now on itunes. This film is based on Roald Dahl's book 'The Witches' and he kind of ruled as a children's author in the  80's and 90's. I remenber watching the original film as a child and found it really scary but not too scary if you know what I mean. The film is about a boy called Luke who stumbles onto a witch convention in a hotel and tries to stop them even when he has been turned into a mouse.

Corpse Bride (2005) (Netflix/Amazon Prime/itunes)

I've only recently watched this and loved it. It's animated, musical film directed by Tim Burton, the king of all things spooky. Victor Van Dort, the son of wealthy fish merchants is bethrothed to Victoria Everglot, the daughter of impoverished aristocrats. Their arranged marriage will raise the social class of Victor's parents and restore the wealth of Victoria's family. Although both fall in love with each other, Victor ruins their wedding rehearsal by forgetting his vows. When Victor is nervously practicing his wedding vows outside, he inadvertently awakens a young woman from her grave. She believes that her fiance is here at last and that they are now married! She whisks him off to the world of the dead. Somehow Victor has to get back to the living and find Victoria. 

Edward Scissorhands (Amazon prime/ Disney + /Dvd)

A Halloween/ Christmas classic inspired by the story of  Frankenstein and his inventor. A scientist builds an animated human being called Edward. Unfortunately the scientist dies before he can finish assembling Edward, leaving him with scissor blades instead of hands. When the local Avon lady Peg calls on Edward she decides to introduce him to her family. Edward falls in love with her daughter Kim, however despite his kindness and artistic talent Edward's hands make him an outcast in the town.

Self Care - 37 Ways To Brighten Up Your Day & Life

This week is self care week. It's really important to take time out for yourself, even when you think you don't have time. You need space to gain perspective, recharge your batteries and have a break. Doing this can help protect your physical and mental health as well as your relationships with those around you. Without self care and periods of relaxation you can be more vulnerable to stress, mental and physical illnesses and arguments with loved ones. If you're having a bad time with anxiety or depression or it's that time of year when someone close to you passed away, its vital to be kinder to yourself so that your symptoms don't get worse and to avoid a negative spiral. Do one nice thing a day if you're going through a bad time, they can be small things like having a nice breakfast, buying your favourite magazine or having a bubble bath. In general it's good to have some 'me time' during the week especially if you're a busy mum or your job is very demanding.

This post has been in the works for a while, the inspiration came from a friend when I showed her a cute animal photo in the newspaper and she responded with "one for the fridge." She explained that whenever she saw a cute animal picture she'd stick it on the fridge so that every time she opened it she'd smile and feel all warm and fuzzy inside! Anyway here are 38 self care ideas for you.

1. One for the fridge. Cut out any cute animals from papers or magazines to decorate the fridge or go digital and start a Pintrest board for them or follow my cute animals board here. 

Another way to remind yourself  that there's some good left in the world is watching Youtube video clips of animals helping other animals here and here. There's also this clip on animals that saved humans and true life rescue stories here.

2. Speak to the people you love. They can give you some advice on how to tackle the situation or offer some reassurance. It will also let them understand what you're going through which could ward off any future arguments. Sometimes you may not want to tell them what you're going through, but just spending time with them or talking to them on the phone will show you that there are people who care about you and who are on your side.

3. Spend time with pets playing or cuddling them. It's been proven that stroking pets decreases your blood pressure. If you haven't got a pet but love dogs then the Borrow My Doggy website will connect you with local dog owners. It costs £10 to sign up and then you can walk a dog or borrow them for weekends and holidays. If you're more of a cat person then get down to a cat cafe and show them some love.

4. Often when we're stressed or depressed we don't talk to ourselves kindly but berate ourselves, so writing a list of things you like about yourself can help to combat this. Repeating affirmations during the day will help, examples such as  'I'm capable and loveable', 'I forgive myself for not being perfect because I know I'm human' and 'I live life to the fullest.'

5.  If you're feeling down or very stressed exercise will actually help. Exercising releases dopamine and seratonin neurotransmitters, two chemicals produced in the brain that promote happiness and lowers depression. It will also change your mindset, perhaps make you feel more energised and change your perspective, enabling you to see that your world is bigger that what is currently making you sad or stressed. I always feel that running is therapeutic because it feels like you are literally running outside and away from your problems you were mulling over indoors. Running alongside a river or park or something picturesque helps. Don't like running? Try Tai Chi and yoga instead, they can be very calming. Or do a Grey's Anatomy and dance it out (my preferred method!) If you're lonely then joining a team sport may help such as netball or football.

6. Write a list of things things that make you happy and do more of them. Having a list nearby will remind you of things that you can do when you're feeling rubbish.

7. Find some of your favourite quotes and frame them. You can buy prints from Etsy or use Canva to make and print your own.

8. Buy yourself some flowers. They'll brighten the place the kitchen table, bedroom or living room.

9. Turn off your mobile, have a no screen day or a digital detox weekend. Sometimes it's good to concentrate on yourself without the interruptions of other people's demands on your time. It's also refreshing to have a no screen weekend and have a break from social media. While using social media we can sometimes compare our bodies and lives to others and end up feeling sad or disappointed instead of focusing on all the good things and people in our own, off screen lives. Taking a break from looking at screen means that you fill your day with other activities, talking or seeing friends, reading a proper book, going for a walk or to the gym. Another idea is to spend the day exploring local attractions.

10. Treat yourself by paying your favourite coffee shop or cafe a visit.

11. Plan a holiday or staycation. Focusing on something positive will help and it will be easier to get through each day knowing you have something to look forward to.

12. Being in nature is known to reduce stress. So take a stroll in the local park, woods or visit the beach. Or a long country walk or hike if you're up for it.

13. Have a laugh. Book yourself tickets to a comedy night or watch a funny TV series. I recommend Fawlty Towers, Friends, Have I got News for You and Mock the Week. My favourite comedians are Katherine Ryan, Russel Howard, Britain's Got Talent Mandy Munden, Andy Parsons, Hugh Dennis and Ed Gamble. 

14. Listen to your favourite songs and create a playlist. Whenever you feel down or need some time to yourself switch on that playlist.

15. Find a project: it can be decorating the spare room, a craft project-perhaps making a present for a friend, restoring a motorbike or researching your family history. This will direct all your energy into something positive and you'll be able to see the progress you're making.

16. Take photos of beautiful things. This can be arty shots of nature, buildings or pictures of your friends, family and pets. You may not be the best at taking photos but the point of this exercise is that it prompts you to notice all the beautiful things around us. You may end up with a lovely family picture to frame as a present or get lots of likes on Instagram if you are posting it there.

17. Book yourself a massage. It will rid you of stress, muscle aches and help bad posture.

18. Have a bath, fill with bath bubbles or bath bombs. Use aromatherapy bath and shower gels.

19. Cook your favourite meal or make yourself a lovely breakfast with pancakes, waffles, fruit salad, chia seed pudding, pastries, a milkshake or smoothie. Have a go baking a cake or loaf of bread.

20.  Do something new. If you've always been interested in photography watch a few Youtube videos or go on a course. If you've ever wanted to learn another language then log onto BBC Languages or Duolingo for free. Ever wanted to play the guitar? Then Youtube tutorials or classes can help.

21. Wear your favourite outfit- whether it be comfortable or sexy-  a flattering dress or pair of jeans. Wearing your favourite clothes gives you confidence that you look good and feel as relaxed and comfortable as possible.

22. Watch your favourite films or TV series. My favourites are Sex and the City, Samantha Who, Singing in the Rain, Harry Potter, Sherlock, Pretty Little Liars and The Good Fight.

23. Create a Space of Peace. This can be a corner of your room or sitting room where you can go and recuperate. Maybe a lovely comfy chair or sofa or a window seat to read by. Decorate with calming things such as candles, flowers, shells, rocks, ornaments, cuddly toys or quotes.

24. Read your favourite books. I find it very comforting to read a book I love and know so well. My favourites are Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, the Harry Potter series and books by Meg Cabot and Lindsey Kelk. In the summer read in the park and in the winter find a cozy fireplace to read by.

25. Wrap up warm and go outside to stargaze. As well as being beautiful, the distance and the all encompassing nature of the universe can put things into perspective.

26. Print out your digital photos or photos from your Instagram or phone. Frame them or display them in a digital photo frame.

27. Ring the changes and try a different makeup look. Browse Pintrest and Youtube tutorials for 'How to' guides and inspiration. Ask for a different haircut at the hairdressers or dye your hair another colour.

28. Enter a competition, it doesn't have to be anything complicated that involves you doing lots of things to enter. You do have to be in it to win it though! You never know, you may be surprised a few weeks or months down the line to find out that  you've won!

29. Colouring for adults has been a big trend because anyone can do it and it can be very relaxing. There are so many different colouring books out there, there's something for everyone!  If you are feeling more creative try your hand at painting or drawing. Here are a couple of free uplifting colouring pages from Frugal Family.

My Inner Peace is Stressing Me Out £4.99 /The Kew Gardens Beautiful Flowers & Plants Colouring Book  £10.19
Fantastical Animals 2: A Wild Adult Colouring Book £4.99/ (Similar Book) Adult Coluring Book  Mandalas and Patterns £2.99 /  Harry Potter Colouring Book £7.72 /  Good Vibes Don't Give Up £5.48

30. Looking back on the past can give us feelings of depression and looking towards the future can produce anxiety, Mindfulness helps you to focus on the moment. You become more aware of  thoughts, feelings, and body sensations without being overwhelmed. It can also be used to  help sleep using progressive muscle relaxation (gradually tensing and releasing muscles) and pain (imagining  the pain to be bigger and vibrant and then diminishing it.) For more information on mindfulness visit Mind. Visual mediation is another way to relax. Visual meditation involves picturing your 'happy' place or the place that you're most relaxed such as on the beach and that you can hear the waves and seagulls etc. Hypnosis is another way to relax and look after our mental health. It has a certain 'image' but really it's something that puts you into a relaxed state and be more open to suggestion or persuasion. So things like someone telling you to smoke less may make you grumble and defensive during the day but under hypnosis you accept the possibility and may subconsciously take the suggestion on board and smoke less. I recommend Glen Harrold and use the app to play his Relax and Sleep and Positive Thinking tracks before I go to sleep.

31. Pamper yourself by having a D.I.Y spa at home. Put on a face mask, give yourself a manicure, soak your feet and apply a moisturisng treatment to your hair. If you have the money book yourself and a relative or friend to a spa.

32. Buy yourself some cozy slippers, jumpers and soft pajamas.

33. Have a good nights sleep. This is something I struggle with. The Sleep Council offers some tips. Make sure your room is completely dark and keep the room temperature around 16-18 degrees. Turn off technology such as phones, TVs and computers and turn away LCD screens such as an alarm clock. Try to start a nighttime ritual or routine to let your body know it's time to relax and sleep. I try to apply a nice body cream and read a book in bed.

34. Sometimes imposing order on something can bring a sense of control back in our lives. As a way to combat lethargy try setting an alarm for 20 minutes and tidy one drawer. That's maybe all you can do and that's fine: mission accomplished! Or you may feel that you're on a roll and end up tidying all the drawers. Alternatively you can declutter your wardrobe, letting go of the clothes you no longer wear and making some room for new clothes! Or you can rearrange your bookshelves by colour, creating a rainbow effect!

35. Write a list of goals-such as places to visit, skills to pick up, things to do and films to watch (one of my current goals is to watch all of Hitchcock's films- all 51 of them!) This directs your energy into something positive and achieve something you've always wanted to do.

36. Get your friends together and try this exercise. Each person writes one good thing about everyone in the room on a Post it note. At the end collect the notes about yourself and stick them on your fridge or in a book for an instant boost when you need it. You also don't have to read them aloud if you don't want to. This is also a good exercise to help you figure out a new direction for your career, because friends and family see qualities we can't always see in ourselves.

37.. Read uplifting self help books- I recommend Lynda Fields tiny book 60 Ways to Feel Amazing, Teach Yourself Relaxation by Richard Craze and Stress Proof Your Life by Elizabeth Wilson.

 I hope these ideas above are helpful. If you come up with any other ideas feel free to tell me in the comments 

12 D.I.Y Mothers Day Presents

Photo Credit: Top Left: Skip To My Lou Top Centre: Lauren Dixon Paver Top Right: The Gurney Sack
Bottom Right: Design Moms Bottom Centre : Live Simply Bottom Right:About a Mom

Mothers day in the U.K is this Sunday 11th March. A handmade gift makes a thoughtful and personalised present. I've put together 12 D.I.Y gift ideas. If you are broke (take a look at the free printable coupons) or want to give something different (check out the hidden jewellery candle) keep reading.

Photo Credit: Top Left: Top Right: A Beautiful Mess  Bottom Left: The Gurney Sack Bottom Right: La Crema

If your mum is a tea drinker (and frankly who doesn't love a cuppa?) I'm sure she'd appreciate a tea hamper. You can make the tea yourself using the recipes by Vassseur Beauty for a spiced chai and a lavender and Camomile tea. Alternatively you can buy ready made loose tea or tea bags. You can fill the hamper with a D.I.Y sharpie pen mug (tutorial here) a teapot, sugar, some D.I.Y tea coasters (tutorial here) and flowers.

If your mum has a sweet tooth then these cute jars full of cookie butter might be right up her street. Pop over to A Beautiful Mess here for the recipe. You can buy chalk labels from Amazon, make your own ones here or use normal sticker labels.

If your mum is more of a wine lover then an etched wine glass makes a personalised present (you can add her name or initial) to go with a nice bottle of wine. You can find the tutorial by La Crema here. Printable mothers day labels can be slapped onto the bottle for nice finishing touch. You can find some free printable labels here and here or make your own using Canva. You can also make a stunning bottle stopper using an old door knob (tutorial here) or trophy type bottle stoppers (here.)  If you're buying a bottle of rose then this cute diy sequin wine bottle bag from Cookies and Calligraphy will add some bling.

A 'Spa in a Jar' has all you need for a bit of D.I.Y pampering. You need a mason jar or one with a wide opening then fill it with items such as a face mask, travel size hand/ body/foot cream, bath bomb or salts, nail polish, eye mask, mini nail file and clippers or scissors. If  you have space then a candle or some wrapped chocolates would be nice to thrown in as well.

Top Left : Polka Dot Chair Top Right: Live Simply Bottom Left: Lauren Dixon Paver Bottom Left Right: Ali Express 

The pocket cushion seen above was created by Melissa from Polka Dot Chair as 'on the go reading cushions' for her nephews with a torch in the pocket.However I think that it would make a lovely gift for a mum, made up in her favourite colour or suitable fabric with some chocolates and her favourite book or the latest one by her favourite author in the pocket. If you're feeling generous you could pop in an e-reader. Photo cushions also make a lovely gift, just follow this Youtube tutorial by Simply Cher Cher. You will need some iron on paper and a home printer. First you print a photo from your home printer onto the iron on paper. Then you iron it onto the fabric- Ta Da! If you're after an instagram style grid/ photos printed on the cushions then watch this Instagram Pillow tutorial by Crafty Amy.

If you can't afford Jo Malone candles you can actually make your own candles and go one better by by making a candle with hidden jewellery inside! You can buy jewellery candles but you can also make them at home at a fraction of the cost and it's actually surprisingly easy! Just follow this Youtube tutorial by Lauren Dixon Paver  or this tutorial by Shellie Wilson which shows how to make a soy candle from scratch as well as using candles bought from a shop. Poundland has some really pretty decorative glass candle holders and mason glasses at the moment.

You can also make your own solid perfume using essential oils. The small tin ensures that it will be easier to travel in a handbag and also easy to rub on to your wrists during the day. Made with beeswax, a carrier oil and essential oils this tutorial by Live Simply will guide you.

Photo Credit: Top Left: About a Mom Top Right: Design Moms Bottom Left: Skip To My Lou Bottom Right: Just Putzing

Herbs are really useful in cooking and are always better fresh. A herb garden makes a practical present as well as being easy and cheap. You can up-cycle some tin cans with paint in your mum's favourite colours and add labels. Then you can buy some herbs from the supermarket or garden centre, About A Mom has a D.I.Y herb garden tutorial here.   Another present for a mum who likes cooking is making up some infused olive oils. Just hop over to Just Putzing where Tina has a tutorial for you. A D.I.Y etched chopping board makes a useful and practical gift, just follow this tutorial by Gabbie at Design Moms.

Finally while Mothers Day Coupons may not look expensive or glamorous they will probably be the most appreciated by making your mum's life easier. Here is a  list of free printable mothers day coupons here.

16 Valentine's Day Breakfast/ Brunch Ideas

For four of the recipes below you will need a heart shaped cookie cutter (metal is best.) There's a wide selection at the Cake Craft Shop (they even have lip shaped cookie cutters too.) Amazon  has a 12cm heart cookie cutter or you can find some on ebay here.

1. English Cooked Breakfast

If you want to fry heart shaped eggs or insert them into your toast you will need an adjustable metal heart cookie cutters or normal cookie cutters. Homey Oh My shows you how to fry heart shaped eggs.If bacon is the way to your partner's heart then try the heart shaped bacon from The Paper Mama.

Top left: Homey Oh My Top Right: Sainsburys  Bottom Left : Sainsburys Bottom Right: The Paper MamaA

2. Healthy-ish 

Bring out the strawberries! You can add chopped strawberries into your usual oatmeal see here or go all out and carve these strawberry roses which look stunning! Just click on the tutorial by Holly from Spend with Pennies or this step by step picture. Another simple way of cutting hearts from strawberries can be found here (courtesy of Homey Oh My.)  The ice cube strawberries and chocolate from Haley at the Cheap Recipe Blog look impressive and are super easy to do! I'm not sure about keeping the stalk though, it doesn't look as pretty but it does give you something to hold while eating them. If you or your partner hate strawberries but like fruit, then use a metal cookie cutter to cut hearts out of melon slices and fill with berries or other fruit to up your game with minimal effort!

Photo Credit Top Left Spend with Pennies Top Right :Ethan Calabrese Bottom Left: Soulouposeto Bottom Right Cheap Recipe Blog

3. Traditional Sweet Breakfast Classics With A Twist 

If you have a waffle iron hiding in a cupboard that's been sitting there since the novelty wore off then get it out to make some red velvet waffles! Sharon from What the Fork shows you how here. While traditional French toast is just eggs and bread, this banana and chocolate French toast takes it to another level! The recipe is from My Recipes here.  Tonya from The Gunny sack will show you how to make buttermilk pancakes, just stack 'em high and layer them with Nutella and raspberry juice on top. You can also step up your pancake game with these pretty lace pattern hearts, they're just waiting to be Instagram-ed and they look so fun to make! You can see a step by step tutorial for this at A Designer Life.

Photo Credit: Top Left: What The Fork Top Right The Gunny Sack Bottom left A Designer Life Bottom Right My Recipes

                                                                    4. Valentine Treats

Cupcakes are fairly practical to eat in bed and these Martha Stewart chocolate cupcakes  look yummy and you can pipe whatever message you like on them. Truffles are simple to make and these 'red velvet', amaretto, gluten-free ones are perfect for Valentines day (They're a no bake as well.) Pop over to Lazy Cat Kitchen and Ania will show you how to make them. The mini chocolate cheesecakes are also a no bake recipe which you can find at Delish with Rachel Connors. Then just sit back and enjoy the day together drinking these strawberry mimosas by Baking Beauty which you can find here !

Photo Credit Top Left Baking Beauty Top Right Lazy Cat Kitchen Bottom Left:Rachel Conners Bottom Right Martha Stewart

16 Ways To Save Money When Christmas Shopping

Updated May 2020

1. Make a List and Check it Twice
No, I'm not quoting Taylor Swift lyrics. Making a list of who you need to buy for, how much money you have and how much you can spend on each person will make your life easier. Just like a supermarket shopping list it can make shopping trips shorter, saving you time as well as money as long as you stick to the list.

2. Secret Santa or Family Gift These both involve buying one gift. 

For Secret Santa, you are randomly assigned a person in the family to buy a present for. You can do this by pulling names from a hat. Once you know who you're buying a present for you have to keep it a secret until you open them on Christmas Day. If you're doing this with friends or colleagues then unwrap them on the day when you all meet up. You can have an agreed budget before you start.

Buying a family gift involves buying one present for the whole family to share. This could be a restaurant gift card, a cinema voucher, a Netflix superscription or a book of photos. It could be a board game or Nintendo Wii game that everyone can play.

3. If you have a large family or lots of people to buy presents for, then try using a 3-tiered gift-giving system. Tier 1 is family which means gift exchanges with each individual person in your immediate family, and set a budget for each person. Tier 2 is friends. You can do a single-family gift like movie tickets with free babysitting or a fun new game for them to play together. Tier 3 is neighbors and co-workers. Gifts like homemade chocolate goodies in handmade package go down a treat. Once you establish the budgets for each tier and the people in them, create a cash envelope for that tier.  Once the cash in the envelope is gone, it’s gone!

4. BLACK FRIDAY IS TODAY!
Adoped from the U.S. Black Friday and Cyber Monday are days when all the shops have huge discounts in the last weekend of November to coincide with the Thanksgiving holiday. But before you leave the house or log on, research what you want to buy. Compare the prices between the different stores before you buy to check whether a bargain is really a bargain. Money Saving Expert's Mega Shop Bot will help you scan hundreds of shops to find you the best price.

5. Shopping tips. 
Set time limits on shopping. Go in, find presents and exit quickly. Also try shopping late in the evening (7-9pm) to beat the crowds.

6. Buy the Expensive Presents First 
Then you know how much money you have to spend on the other gifts and don't run out of money or end up paying more than your agreed limit.

7. Pay with cash
You will be more aware of what you're spending.

8. Don't Touch Display Items
This is because handling an object creates possessive feelings according to researchers at UCLA and the University of Wisconsin-Madison. They found that holding an ordinary item like a coffee mug increased people's desire to buy it — and made them willing to pay 10% more for it. So "Look, but don't touch" to avoid spontaneous splurges.

9. Stop the Momentum 
The 'Momentum effect' is where we can get caught in a whirl of impulse buys. Buying one thing rushes into another and another even if they aren't on your Christmas list. To avoid this take a breather after every purchase. It's also an excuse to try out the seasonal drinks from Starbucks and Costa Coffee! This momentum effect also occurs online too so break up your shopping online as well.

10. When you shop online leave the items in the virtual basket and don't check them out. This can prompt retailers to send you discount code to get you to spend money at their store. I know Amazon lets you know if their prices go down (but also tells you when they go up which isn't so helpful.) Live chatting with customer service agents can work to your advantage if you let them know that a price  is out of your budget they may be able to come back with a discounted deal.

11. Gifts With Purchase
The guilt free way to indulge yourself and buy a Christmas present at the same time! Buying a gift with purchase is a win win all round! You often have to spend a set amount to receive the gift but it's never extortionate.

12.  Use reward points 
There's never a better time to cash in those Boots and Nectar card points to spend on Christmas presents.

13. Free Amazon gift cards
You can earn free Amazon gift vouchers for Christmas. These involve completing surveys, playing games, searching the internet and taking photos of your receipts. See Martin Lewis's Money Saving Expert for more details here and Save the Student here.

14. Ebay 
You can find lots good deals on ebay. The ebay app makes it easier to bid on the go. If you search 'Ending Soonest' on the listings, then choose ones with fewer bidders you can pick up a real bargain. However don't forget to factor in the shipping times especially if you're buying anything from China, U.S. or Australia. 

15. D.I.Y Presents
I will be writing a longer post on this but D.I.Y presents are thoughtful, handmade presents such as having someones favourite Instagram photo framed or giving someone babysitting coupons offering to babysit in the new year.

16. Pouch 
Pouch is an app that you add to your browser that lets you know about voucher codes and deals as you shop. It works with Google Chrome, Apple Safari and Mozilla Firefox. It was featured on Dragon's Den in the U.K..